Humor

Friday funny

April 29, 2005

During the daily work online I came across this statement describing a high school laptop program: "students become experienced with high end computer software such as Windows, Office, and much more."

I wonder now if they use high-end General Motors station wagons for drivers' education too.

Phishing phun

February 2, 2005

I was just reading one of the oh-so-frequent phishing scams purporting to be from eBay. It reads in part

Per the User Agreement, Section 9, we may immediately issue a warning, temporarily suspend, indefinitely suspend or terminate your membership and refuse to provide our services to you if we believe that your actions may cause financial loss or legal liability for you, our users or us.

And here I thought the whole idea was to buy and sell goods through auctions, including transactions of money, aka a legal liability (assuming the auction was not fraudulent). If only it actually said something so humorous.

Managing large projects

October 18, 2004

Today brings news that FedEx will build a Private Solar System. "We're tired of the current collection of planets and would like our own set of planets. It's much easier than dealing with problems on Earth," said an anonymous company representative.

OK so that is obviously a spoof, but sometimes headline writers should read what they write.

What's with the maps

September 18, 2004

In the category of things that really don't matter... Watching Real Time with Bill Maher tonight I was puzzled by the map in the background. The map is a map of the United States with cities highlighted on it. Normal enough. For example New Mexico has Albuquerque and Santa Fe, Arizona has Phoenix and Tucson. Colorado has Denver and Utah has Salt Lake City. All pretty normal. Generally large cities and some smaller state capitals. The curiosity is that Nevada has only Carson City and not Las Vegas. Odd.

I'll drink to that...

November 25, 1998

A few months ago someone pointed out to a coworker that the following trick or "easter egg" is hidden in Microsoft Word:

  1. Type in "I'd like to kill Bill Gates".
  2. Select the sentence and choose Tools -> Language ->Thesaurus from the menu.
  3. The suggested alternative is "I'll drink to that".

Today it came around again. This time "I'll bet Clinton will resign" was the magic phrase. The result? It's the same. In fact you can get word to do it to any phrase starting with I'll or I'd -- probably anything starting with I' for that matter.

But there's real work to be done.

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